MAP07: Netiquette

The Internet, however, is made up of more than computers and commands. All of the computers and commands would be useless if it weren't for the people who used the computers and commands. The commands are neat, but it is the PEOPLE who make the Internet what it is.

The problem is that every grouping of people develops its own culture and common rules that governs the behavior of the people.

This lesson is going to give you an insider's look at how to avoid some of the mistakes that EVERYONE makes when they start out on the Internet. If you can take what is said in this lesson to heart, you are going to find that your travels on the Information Superhighway are going to be a whole lot smoother.

The following "Netiquette" guide (that's the common way to describe the etiquette of the Internet) was written by my father, the Rev. Bob "Bob" Crispen. I think you'll soon see where my sense of humor comes from :)

In fact, it was because of my dad that I first got onto the Internet (I got an e-mail account so that I could e-mail him and ask him for money).

Evangelism

In the entire history of the net, no one has managed to do this without looking like a complete idiot. If you believe you are the one person who will succeed where millions have failed, then you're ready to learn about ...

Flames

     >It's a bright, sunny day today.

     You filthy *@!?$, what have you got against Seattle?

1. Hedge your bets. Rather than saying, "Metal rules! Death to all that oppose!!" try saying "In my humble opinion (often abbreviated IMHO) metal bands perfectly express my feelings, choices, and lifestyle. Your mileage may vary" (another net cliche', less frequently abbreviated YMMV). By the way, BTW is another frequent net abbreviation, for what it's worth (FWIW).
   
   
2. Apologize. When misunderstanding is the culprit, and especially if you respect the person who misunderstood, take the blame on yourself for being unclear, apologize, say what you meant more clearly (if appropriate) and put it behind you. As in real life (remember that?) people who are quick to anger are often equally quick to forgive.
   
   
3. Avoid flame bait (conduct which gravely offends the norms, mores and folkways of a particular group). "Now wait a minute!" you say. "Do you mean that something that's accepted behavior on one list or newsgroup will draw dozens of stinging, ridiculing comments in another?" I sure do. What can you do? Lurk a while before you post. Read what's said like an anthropologist, trying to discover what the big no-nos are. The beginning of a school term is a wonderful time to do this, as you will observe the clueless newbies who weren't smart enough to read this paragraph being torn to shreds. There are some things you should NEVER do, and we'll list them in a minute, but let's get to the last bit of advice.
   
   
4. Bow down to the group's gods. In every Usenet newsgroup and listserv mailing list there are old, grey heads who have earned the respect of everyone in the group. For example, amongst the subscribers to the list discussing the late American bandleader Stan Kenton are the producer of a Kenton box set and the authors of definitive Kenton biographies and discographies. You are entirely ignorant compared to those people. Never pretend you're anything else. They would dearly love to help you -- to answer a question, help you find a rare record -- but you'll always come out second best in a head-butting contest with them.

Dos and don'ts (or how to avoid most flames)

1. • DON'T include the entire contents of a previous posting in your reply.
   • DO cut mercilessly. Leave just enough to indicate what you're responding to. NEVER include mail headers except maybe the "From:" line. If you can't figure out how to delete lines in your mailer software, paraphrase or type the quoted material in.
2. • DON'T reply to a point in a posting without quoting or paraphrasing what you're responding to and who said it. Reason: a dozen postings may occur between the original message and your reply. At some sites your reply may get there before the original.
   • DO quote (briefly or paraphrase. If the original "Subject:" line was "Big dogs", make sure yours says "Re: Big dogs". Some REPLY functions do this automatically. By net convention, included lines are preceded by ">" (greater-than) signs). Some mail editors and newsreaders do this automatically. Others require you to do it manually or set the "indent character" to ">".
3. • DON'T send a message saying "Why doesn't anybody say anything about X?" or "Who wants to talk about X?"
   • It's always a risk to start a new topic (often called a thread). The group may have just finished a long, bitter war about that very subject. But if you want to take the risk, SAY SOMETHING yourself about the subject you're raising.
4. • DON'T send lines longer than 70 characters. This is a kindness to folks with terminal-based mail editors or newsreaders. Some mail gateways truncate extra characters turning your deathless prose into gibberish.
   • Some mail editor tools only SEEM to insert line breaks for you, but actually don't, so that every paragraph is one immense line. Learn what your mail editor does.
5. • DON'T SEND A MESSAGE IN ALL CAPS. CAPITALIZED MESSAGES ARE HARDER TO READ THAN LOWER CASE OR MIXED CASE.
   • DO use normal capitalization. Separate your paragraphs with blank lines. Make your message inviting to your potential readers.
6. • DON'T betray confidences. It is all too easy to quote a personal letter in a posting to the entire group.
   • DO read the "To:" and "Cc:" lines in your message before you send it. Are you SURE you want the mail to go there?
7. • DON'T make statements which can be interpreted as official positions of your organization or offers to do business. Saying "Boy, I'd sure like to have one of them Crays" could result in a truck at your loading dock and a bill in the mail even larger than your student loan.
   • DO treat every post as though you were sending a copy to your boss, your minister, and your worst enemy.
8. • DON'T rely on the ability of your readers to tell the difference between serious statements and satire or sarcasm. It's hard to write funny. It's even harder to write satire.
   • DO remember that no one can hear your tone of voice. Use emoticons (or smilies) like :-) or ;^) -- turn your head counterclockwise to see the smile. You can also use caps for emphasis or use net conventions for italics and underlines as in: You said the guitar solo on "Comfortably Numb" from Pink Floyd's _The Wall_ was *lame*? Are you OUT OF YOUR MIND???!!!
9. • DON'T make a posting that says nothing but "Me, too." This is most annoying when combined with (1) or (2) above. Ditto for "I don't know."
   • DO remember the immortal words of Martin Farquhar Tupper (1810-1889): "Well-timed silence hath more eloquence than speech."

Finally, many groups have had the sense to write down some of their norms and folkways in a frequently asked questions (FAQ) list along with (what else?) the answers to frequently asked questions. Many Usenet FAQs are posted monthly or so on the news.answers. Listowners of listservs are often quite willing to mail you the FAQ for the list. In fact, they may have already told you where it is in the letter you get welcoming you to the list.

With all we've said above, and with all the help newsgroup moderators and listowners are providing to newcomers, it almost seems like you'd have to work at it to go charging in with your mouth open and your eyes and ears shut, thereby aggravating and alienating some otherwise perfectly nice people. The good Lord gave us two eyes and two ears and one mouth to remind us of that very thing. But he gave us ten fingers, and here we are.

Actually, Arlene Rinaldi has a HUGE Netiquette guide that I am going to show you how to retrieve using file transfer protocol, gopher, and the WWW later on in the workshop.

So your homework is:

1. Save this lesson.
2. Reread this lesson several times.

1. My smileys don't have noses :)
   Go back to where this citation is referenced.

   (\__/)  .~    ~. ))
   /O O `./      .'               PATRICK DOUGLAS CRISPEN
  {O__,   \    {                   PCRISPE1@UA1VM.UA.EDU
    / .  . )    \                THE UNIVERSITY OF ALABAMA
    |-| '-' \    } ))
   .(   _(   )_.'         Roadmap: Copyright 1994 Patrick Crispen.
  '---.~_ _ _&                      All rights reserved.

                          The views expressed in this letter do not
                            necessarily represent the views of the
                             University of Alabama - Tuscaloosa.

Go back to the Syllabus

MAP08: Usenet

MAP06: Other Mail Servers